Paris, 1961, French Secret Service
Hello Dubreuil, Préjean speaking.
Yes. Good, thank you.
Dubreuil, the file I told you about is ready.
When can I give it to the minister?
Great. See you on Thursday. Thanks, Dubreuil.
I owe you one.
Well done, Moïse, we got him. He's screwed.
Mercaillon File, Evidence Of Collaboration
Yes, he just got in. Please hold.
Hello, Colonel, it's the minister's office for you.
I'll take the call in my office. All right, Colonel.
If I get this to work...
This new phone is also the switchboard.
It's nice but I need to get used to it.
You'll have to. We haven't been pushing ourselves enough.
We now have these new setups
that reflect France's status as a great nation
and this isn't window dressing.
Let's keep in mind that it's to increase efficiency.
Got it, Colonel.
Mercaillon speaking.
Hello, Dubreuil.
This is slander, it goes without saying.
Thanks for warning me, Dubreuil. I owe you one.
Brussels
So why do you want to give me this information?
Because France and the US are allies.
We're on the same side, Agent Calot.
Perhaps.
But who says this alliance is mutual
and who says today's side will also be tomorrow's?
Look, the Castrists are holding your agent hostage in Cuba.
If French Intelligence isn't interested in this information,
let me know once and for all, Calot.
Stop believing the CIA knows what others ought to know.
France knows exactly where its agents are
and if we've lost one,
we had good reasons for that, whatever they are.
Well done, Calot. Thanks to you,
we've finally tracked down our agent.
As a result, you three are flying to Cuba tomorrow,
to exfiltrate our agent who's being held hostage.
Priority mission. No way.
We got all our boxes to unpack.
All of my boxes have been emptied,
I've sorted all my stuff. I'm available.
Moulinier's right.
Why us? Because you're the best.
We do tend to forget that.
You might...
Come on, Gomez, where are your manners?
Sorry, but it seemed urgent.
Ah, Colonel.
We have a problem. What is it now?
You don't like our new office?
Not modern enough? Your office isn't big enough?
Not at all, Colonel.
We have smaller ones. No, Colonel. I'm fine.
It's about Cuba.
Our agent got lost.
The CIA is asking us to keep still.
The form came back from the higher ups,
unstamped.
I don't care about the CIA and the Americans are a pain in the ass.
But it's an order from the Élysée Palace.
France never abandons
its departments nor its agents.
Don't worry about it, intervene.
I'll cover for you.
Go save our agent.
On his behalf, thank you, Colonel.
No traitors on this wall, it's for agents who died
with courage and loyalty. Get rid of it.
Three pairs of black pants. Well received.
Three black sweaters. Well received.
Three regulation swimsuits. Well received.
Three pairs of black espadrilles.
Well received. Your signatures.
There you go.
Enjoy your mission.
Left-handed or right-handed?
Right-handed.
Ambidextrous.
Which arm do you want the shot in?
Both.
Yellow fever,
hepatitis A, typhoid.
Tetanus, polio, smallpox, dengue.
Japanese encephalitis,
meningococcus,
whooping cough,
diphtheria.
Could you also do plague and rabies, please?
What's going on?
One. Two.
Three.
Okay.
Let's go.
Hello, Clayborn.
Finally! You took your time.
Gather up your stuff, we're taking you back to France.
No.
What do you mean, "no"?
I'm staying here. You can let them know.
You're quitting public service?
What about your retirement and all your bonuses?
Now get out of my home.
What do you mean, "my home"?
She's been brainwashed,
flash-indoctrination.
Just like the Soviets.
Well, gentlemen, we're not here for chitchat.
Our orders are clear.
Come on, Clayborn, don't be shy. We won't look.
Of course.
With her belly, it'll be tough to slip this on.
It's not very clever of you to end up like this.
What did you do?
I think I know how that happened.
Classic.
The Cuban revolutionaries got her to spawn a creature
to bolster their ranks and ensure her loyalty through motherhood.
There's no answer to that.
You could've been careful though.
How are you going to get rid of it now?
For your information, I'm keeping this child
and I'm going to live with his father, Ernesto,
right here, in Cuba.
You're going to marry a Cuban named Ernest?
I never talked about marriage. Ernest!
Is everything okay? Yes.
Seize these imperialistic invaders...and hang them!
Okay!
Ernesto, they're French soldiers.
You may need France's help in the future.
You're right, querida.
They're soldiers.
Firing squad instead.
Come.
If you talk, you get the firing squad.
If you don't talk, you still get the firing squad,
but we'll make it real slow.
We'll start with a bullet in the knee,
then another one in the liver.
Did you come here to disarm the Revolución?
You frogs are the puppets of the Americanos.
No, that's the Brits, the Anglos.
Excuse me.
We only came here to get our agent back.
On the other hand, the Americanos, they don't like your Revolución one bit.
If they really get angry, you have no chance.
You guys are on your own.
You may run out of coconuts, Ernesto.
You'll be hanged tomorrow morning at 10 o'clock.
Good evening, sir. Evening.
Good evening, Dad.
Yvon, sit up straight.
Did you have a good day, Maurice?
As usual.
Marthe, you forgot the ice-cubes again!
I'm sorry, madam.
"I'm sorry, madam". She's so uneducated.
I'd get it quicker if I did it myself
instead of telling her how to do it.
Well, Sophie,
this paper is putting you in a somber mood. You'd better
read l'Aurore. The news is more uplifting.
These leftist rags aren't appropriate for a young woman.
I have no news from André.
Don't worry, my darling.
The phone lines must be very bad over there.
Perhaps.
He asked me to marry him and now he's vanished. Don't you think it's weird?
For a working man, it's out of sight, firm behind.
I mean "out of mind".
Just look at your father and I.
André is nothing like Dad.
You'll get some news soon,
good or bad.
Come on, Maurice. You never know.
Yvon received his military papers this morning.
He will be stationed in Germany,
in Sigmaringen. That's so far away, Maurice.
Twenty-eight months isn't so long.
650 kilometers! Nine hours by train!
I thought you could pull some strings.
You talked about the base in Balard.
I did pull some strings, but that's all I could get.
What did you expect from a humble civil servant
at the Department of Veteran Affairs.
It beats Algeria, doesn't it?
Thank you, Dad.
Sigmaringen is very pretty.
Dinner's served, madam.
At last.
What about the ice-cubes?
So.
The following bonuses have been validated:
exotic vaccines,
jet-lag, aquatic environment,
special equipment,
hostile tropical flora
and unassisted break-out from behind enemy lines.
You forgot "use of a foreign language".
También.
Use of a foreign language.
Well done, gentlemen. Mission accomplished. You're the best.
We're having drinks.
Cuban revolutionaries may be known
for their cruelty and their lack of pity,
but against French rigor and experience, they stood no chance.
They turned to mush.
These Cubanos fell flat like a tortilla!
Ah, that's a good one, Guy!
Can I ask you a question? Ask away.
The Cuba mission is accomplished, but Agent Clayborn isn't back.
Yes.
Well, I don't really get how that works.
I was wondering...
How come the mission was stamped?
Ever seen an agent breastfeed, change diapers,
knit, clean up,
do the dishes and cook for her husband?
She's no longer an agent since she's a pregnant woman.
And?
So, she's a non-agent, ergo...
no exfiltration, ergo...
mission accomplished and stamped. Bonuses.
Well done, Guy! You'll get hired for certain!
Bravo.
Do you guys want another drink?
Yes. Same thing?
Same thing.
This guy is impressive.
When was the last time we had such a good intern?
Never. Nunca.
Come on, Calot. Stop showing off your Spanish skills.
Everything's fine. Very well.
Good. Let me congratulate you again.
Especially for your extraordinary escape from a hostile environment.
Extraordinary.
Be careful with the electromagnetic gear.
Sir? Yes, Gomez?
My parents are celebrating their lace anniversary at Le Touquet,
or rather nearby, in Cucq-Trépied.
Their what?
Their lace anniversary. 39 years of marriage.
Next year will be their emerald wedding anniversary.
Then it's iron, pearl, flannel,
topaz, vermilion, lavender, cashmere, cedar...
I got it, Gomez, get to the point.
I need to leave today. The train for the Touquet leaves at 6,
so it would be safer to get to there by 5.
It'll take me 25 minutes by metro to get there,
if I round it up to one hour, I must leave by 4.
It takes nine minutes to walk to the metro station.
Let's say 20, to be safe. Gomez, get to the point.
I need to clear my desk, close the door, and say goodbye,
and check that the door is locked, so 10 to 15 minutes...let's say 20.
Or rather 30.
Since lunchtime ends at a quarter to two, I was thinking...
When do you want to leave?
Now. Time flies, it's almost 12:30. I'd need at least...
You can go. What? Right.
Deputy Director Moïse, as of right now,
you are suspended for aggravated insubordination
and for non-compliance with stamping procedures.
I don't understand. You were supposed to cover for me.
You told me you...
You tricked me. I don't know what you're talking about.
You wanted to save an agent and went against the General's orders.
You took a risk, now you're paying the price.
So you're scared of me.
Me, scared of you?
You're right to be scared.
We all have our little secrets we'd like to keep to ourselves.
I am certainly not scared of a man
who's about to be court-marshaled for going against the General's orders
and for putting France at risk. Yes you are.
You're scared that I would divulge what we both know about you.
I know more than you think I do.
One day, everybody will know, whatever you do.
You're a long way from knowing what I really know, you know?
Your days are numbered running this department, Colonel.
You're a pain in the ass, Georges.
Your infallible honesty, your moral rigor, your stinginess.
I'm not stingy. Yes you are.
No. I just don't like breaking large bills.
Good for you. Where I'm sending you
for the next decade, you won't have any bills to break,
just rocks.
Have a nice day, Georges Préjean.
We're not done yet, you and I.
For once, I agree with you.
US-Cuban relationship reaches breaking point
By ignoring to non-stamped nature of a mission form,
Deputy Director Moïse disobeyed the General
and triggered an unprecedented diplomatic crisis on a global scale.
Consequently, the downgrading procedure for double gross misconduct
needs to be applied.
Gomez, proceed.
Gomez?
Gomez has a lace wedding anniversary to attend, Colonel.
Very well. I shall do it myself.
Returning of medals.
It's so unexpected. Does it really surprise you?
I always thought he was hiding something, but what?
Why? And from whom?
Returning of office supplies.
Done, Colonel.
You can't trust people with short arms and deep pockets.
"Moïse" means Moses, that's an ambiguous alias.
Maybe it isn't.
Georges Préjean,
by the powers vested in me,
pending your trial in martial court,
I hereby strip you of all your medals and functions.
Take him away.
I'd like to remind you all to vote "yes"
on Sunday's referendum on self-determination for Algeria.
It's a question of loyalty to the General.
Make no mistake.
How are you Mr.Moïse? Do you need anything?
I'm fine thank you. That's real sweet of you, Marie-Jo.
Hold on.
I have a favor to ask you.
Nothing complicated, but it's very important to me.
If I can be of any help...
Here. Take my keys, go to my home.
Oh, I don't think so. It's for my parrot.
Could you please feed him tonight?
I don't know about that, sir. He's a good parrot.
He needs to eat.
Well, all right, it's not that poor creature's fault.
Thank you, dear Marie-Jo.
Could you also talk to him, he loves it.
He's a parrot, it's a chatterbox species.
You're right. They do talk a lot.
Tell him: "Napoleon is in St.Helena".
Napoleon is at St.Helena?
He likes it. I have no idea why.
That's funny!
Don't tell anyone, sir. Of course not.
"Napoleon is in St.Helena", remember that.
Thank you so much,
for me, but also for him.
How are you, Polly?
Napoleon is in St.Helena.
All clear.
Got it.
Napoleon is in St.Helena.
Who is it?
It's the plumber.
Nice cleavage?
Nice cleavage!
Napoleon is in St.Helena.
Henri, you're prickly.
Napoleon is in St.Helena.
What did you say?
What did you just say?
Say it again.
Napoleon is in St.Helena.
Did you ever wonder who could've freed us in Cuba?
What? What do you mean?
Well, there were these noises.
And someone cut us loose. Noises?
I didn't hear anything. Me neither.
We freed ourselves. Classic Calot.
You see mysteries everywhere.
You're right.
¡Viva Cuba!